"Mugged Blogger Returns from Bog"

I'm back after being abducted by aliens disguised as computer salesmen and major booksellers, who tried to take all my money but only found one Canadian dime, two shiny new pennies and a half-sucked sour ball in crumbling cellophane in my pockets. Which they took.

Then they hit me upside the head and dumped me in a foggy ditch where I woke up this morning, still the alter ego of a science fiction author but not knowing quite what to do with the five novels in my backpack that they completely overlooked.

I might sell them for food but then I just might use them to whomp the next computer salesman or bookseller who tries to puts his or her hands in my pockets again. And that was a lemon sour ball, too. My favorite.