The Barstool Journal of Jonco Bugos
Showing posts with label spy. spying. Show all posts
Showing posts with label spy. spying. Show all posts

Wednesday, March 23, 2011

The Biggest and Most Secret Spy Bot


At Think-A-Holic Lounge, we certainly have our troubles with bots and the worst kind of trouble any bot can give anybody is to spy on them for some higher-up. It's usually the owner of a business but more often than you'd think it's a government agency doing the spying these days, its crooked employees thinking they're legally empowered to spy on their fellow citizens. Wrong.

Snooping on taxpayers, on behalf of their country, is the fastest growing enterprise on Earth. While customers usually know they're being spied upon and don't really give a hoot, citizens are the last to know they're being spied upon by their own government and the first to object when they do find out about it. And that's because all government espionage against the citizenry is illegal. Always was and always will be.

But, even though spying is routine here at Think-A-Holic Lounge, it's even more routine on planet Earth. Earthlings still aren't used to being spied upon whenever they pump gasoline or enter a fitting room or cash a check or order take-out from a drive though window. But it happens every day. So, they're sure as hell not going to want to hear that they're actually being spied upon by the biggest spy bot in their solar system and, quite possibly the entire constellation. Why do you think the same side of the moon always faces you?

But it's not your government spying on you from the moon, or any government on Earth, for that matter. Yep, that's right, the moon is not made of green cheese and it's not hollow and it's not an alien spaceship. It's a spy bot for Big Jack & Co. Say "cheese" if you want to. Or, better yet, just watch your step.

Thursday, January 20, 2011

Spy Bot

Right. It's a Thursday afternoon, Earth Time, and that can be just about anytime at Think-A-Holic Lounge. But, it just so happens that it's also Thursday afternoon here, too. And, since I have the place practically to myself, I decided to make a little entry into my bar stool journal about bots.

Don't think for one minute that I like bots just because I write about them all the time. I don't like bots at all. I like people and creatures that are alive and I think that buying or renting a bot to do the job of a living creature who could really use the money, is shortsighted, if nothing else. But, I don't make the rules around here. I just follow them. Then I get to point an accusing finger at the bots that have been hired at Think-A-Holic Lounge. Like Beam Bot, Bot Boy, Brain Bot and Drive-Off.

And now, as if there aren't enough bots around here, snooping and guarding and pushing and shoving and even taking our money, the management just rented the latest thing in spy bots (see pic). As far as I know, this one doesn't even have a name, just a model number somewhere on it's spherical surface. All day long it just floats around spying on us when we drink and eat and even when we play darts.

Rumor has it that this annoying bot is supposed to be looking for pickpockets. Well, the only pickpocket Think-A-Holic Lounge ever had was Fred Fortune and we ran him outta here a long time ago. So, as far as I'm concerned, this spy bot is nothing more than another toy bot for Angus McCloud, our big-ass head bartender.

Rumor also has it that Angus is a regular customer at Bots R U.